Life + Lessons at 40

40 bday
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Life + Lessons at 40

10 years ago, I was diagnosed with ovarian cancer and was recovering from a surgery. I was coming out of a broken engagement. I had no career because I had wrapped up everything to move to LA after marriage. I hardly had any close friends to lean on. I did not have a therapist. What I had was an extremely supportive family. And yet, I was lost and I was trying hard not to be lost.

From there to here, today, at 40, life couldn’t be better. Yes, I can ask for more but I am very content with what I already have. The past 10 years have been full of learnings, growth, healing, hair cuts, changing cities, heart break, letting go, existential and identity crisis, experiencing depression multiple times, changing careers a couple of times, being lost, being found and everything in between. Life, as you know it, happened! Fully!

Looking back now, I realize that I have enjoyed every bit of it.

And here I am now, to share with you some hard-earned lessons from over the years. More than for you, these are a reminder for my own self.

1 – Change is inevitable. Suck it up and accept it.

2 – Boundaries! Boundaries! Boundaries! Create. Maintain. Assert. Repeat.

3 – Include more silence and pauses in your daily life. 

4 – Chocolate is therapy in itself.

5 – Have you tried cacao yet?

6 – The more you rest well, the better you will be at whatever you do.

7 – There is no purpose of LIFE. It just is.

8 – Your body knows and holds the truth. LISTEN to her!

9 – We all need a community. Find yours.

10 – Make it your mission to disrupt stagnant patterns. All around you and within you.

11 – Letting go of anger is a graaaaaaadual process.

12 – All friendships don’t last and it is ok. Move on.

13 – Womb. Voice. Menstrual Health.

14 – Have you tried a menstrual cup yet? If not, give it an honest try before you cancel it.

15 – Or else try a cloth pad. 

16 – Age is just a number. Start a Ph D at 30. Find love at 40. Start a new career at 47. Reinvent yourself at 55. Smash patriarchy at 60(I mean, at every age).

17 – Thirty is an important number. Invest in a good eye cream post 30 years of age.

18 – Follow your heart and find the courage to follow it through.

19 – It is ok to feel opposing emotions at the same time.

20 – Heal your relationship with your parents and feel yourself thrive.

21 – Exercise regularly. And I don’t mean walking around your house with a phone in your hand.

22 – Be in nature more often.

23 – Learn to use tech effectively. Take advantage of the technological revolution.

24 – Find a therapist! Do I really need to say this again?

25 – Read the book, The Alchemist.

26 – Believe in magic.

27 – Be mindful of what you are feeding yourself.

28 – You can agree to something and not accept it.

29 – Call that friend you have been thinking of.

30 – Be comfortable with conflicts. Having a good fight is a way to grow together.

31 – You must watch ‘The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel’ on Prime video.

32 – Learn to apologize without giving an explanation.

33 – Write and draw with your non-dominant hand once in a while.

34 – Say ‘No’ more often. Get comfortable with it.

35 – It is ok to feel fear. As long as the fear isn’t in the driver’s seat.

36 – Do you know who is Brene Brown? Go find out, now.

37 – Read Daring Greatly by Brene Brown.

38 – Hobbies are good to have. Or once in a while, just do something you normally won’t do. Break the monotony.

39 – Put on music and dance like crazy.

40 – Teach your kids or the kids around you to sing out loud. Sing with them.

41 – Learn to love money and respect it.

42 – Slow down, regularly.

Share with me in the comments what resonates for you!

And feel free to send me your wishes and blessings. Thank you!

Comments (2)

  1. Himani

    Hey,that’s amazing….lots to value from the pointers ..thankyou for sharing ….

    1. Avatar photo

      Thank you Himani!

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